Life is happening for you – interview with Naama Zusman

At the beginning of this pandemic most of us were worried about our health, about finances, about the future... Lockdown triggered a lot of anxiety for people. I have the feeling that now many people are afraid to openly admit that they quite like the changes this pandemic has brought. Do you agree?

Yes. It’s such a great mirror to our human experience. So often when change appears in our lives (especially unexpected) our autopilot response is to resist it. We are wired to avoid change, it’s in our DNA to fear change. There is a part in our brain which is responsible for our survival and that part perceives anything which is out of the familiar as a threat. As part of its protection mechanism it produces thoughts that trigger anxiety, worry, stress… But when we actually surrender to the new experience or when the new experience is forced on us (like with lockdown) we see that perhaps this change we were so scared of is not so bad or even positive.

As people started talking about going back to normal new fears appeared. Fear of losing some of the positive changes lockdown has brought to our lives – the slowing down, the simplicity, the back to basics, etc. How can we deal with that? 

Some people won’t like my answer to this question. But honestly, the way to deal with it is to get brutal honest with yourself. With the way you lived your life pre-pandemic and how you want your life to be like post pandemic. It saddens me that so many people don’t take ownership on their lives. They let circumstances dictate their lives instead of taking the drivers sit. I know it can be hard and challenging, but isn’t life worth it?
I think the pandemic has been a mirror to our shadows. An invitation to do the inner work and reflect on our lives. And as things go back to ‘normal’ we have the power to decide which ‘normal’ we want to go back to. This reminds me a quote I love “If you don’t like where you’re at. Move, you are not a tree.” Many people forget they get to choose.  

What if we don’t feel like going back to busy social life? Does it necessarily mean we become anti-social?

Again, I think it’s all about choosing what feels right for you. Exploring a good balance that works and honours your needs, desires, believes, values and priorities. Then creating boundaries based on that. It’s also important to let go of the all-or-nothing back-or-white approach to life, and lean more towards the grey. You can be social and honour your needs to have solo quiet time. It’s also important to acknowledge that we have different needs at different time, and to honour that. 

On one hand, there’s a talk about going back to normal. On the other hand, everything indicates that life will never be exactly the same. This can trigger stress for some people. What can we do to build a sense of security in this duality?

Nothing is ever permanent. This pandemic is reminding us this law of the universe. Things are constantly changing and evolving. I think it’s important to acknowledge that even without pandemic, the future is never certain. The world around us is always change. We cannot control things that happen ‘outside of us.’ However, what we can control is the way we react to things. The way to navigate through uncertainty is to build self trust and resilience. To have the conviction that you can carry yourself and care for yourself through challenges. I truly believe that we only get challenges that we are capable of dealing with. We can find inner peace when we connect with trust. In ourselves and in the universe.

There are many people who assume that creating change in their lives is impossible. They believe they don’t have enough time for such things. What would you advise them? What is the best place to start so that we don’t give up too soon?

To start shifting away from victim mentality. Life is not happening to you it’s happening for you. And it’s happening right now. If you are unhappy, you are the only one who has the power to change it. No one is going to do it for you. Stop living in a hypothetical future -- “when then…” “if then…” You cannot change your future in the future, you can only change your future now, in the present moment.
My advice would be to explore your limiting belief around happiness. If you think you don’t have time to change, is it because you believe happiness is a luxury? When did you form this belief? If you believed that happiness is your #1 priority and your birth-right, what would you be doing differently?

My 10-week group coaching program, Finally ME, is a roadmap to creating a trusting relationship with yourself – body, mind and beyond. A journey of self-discovery, shadow work and dreaming a new reality. I’ll be opening the doors to this program very soon and would love to invite anyone who feels called to do this work to join me (together with a group of amazing women) on this journey. You can find all the details about the program + get on the waitlist over here.

Naama Zusman is a Mindset Coach who specializes in empowering women to find the answer to their biggest questions and decisions within. Through her intuitively driven method, she helps free them from the need to overanalyze, make pros and cons lists, and seek the advice of others. Instead, they become intuitive decision-makers who trust in those quiet, yet powerful internal cues.

photos: Naama’s archive